A conversation on love and friendship with Ann Patchett

A couple of years ago I wrote about a small moment on a beach in Puglia: 'The morning Dan was swimming in the sea, when I shouted "Wave!" as one rolled toward him from behind, and he just waved his hand, and I laughed because it was silly."

There are thousands of moments like this one that have slipped through the sieve of my mind like water. But becaus…